I am the first to admit my faults.Trust me, there is a long list of them. I am a bit of a control freak, and I don't have a lot of patience. My friends will tell you when I want something done, I want it done now.

By Barbara High
Tribune Staff Writer
I am the first to admit my faults.Trust me, there is a long list of them. I am a bit of a control freak, and I don’t have a lot of patience. My friends will tell you when I want something done, I want it done now.
Oh let me tell you that I am late for everything. My mother tells me all the time that I will be late for my own funeral. The whole family jokes about telling me that things start an hour earlier than it really does just so I will be there on time.
I also forgive way too easily. What? You don’t think that is a fault? How about this one… my heart is too big!
Do you not consider a big heart a flaw… even when it causes you great pain? I can’t begin to tell you how many times I hurt cause I loved too much, or because I loved the wrong people.
Not  everyone is this world is going to have the same kind of heart as I do, and until that changes… sadly I will continue to hurt.
You see it’s bad enough that I have to deal with the news every day with my job. I read and often write horrible things that people do to one another and it physically pains me. You see my friends, it hurts my heart. I can’t understand why anyone would do the horrible things to each other that they do. I could never hurt people in the ways that I read. I don’t want to see anyone hurt, let alone be the reason for their pain.
I don’t think hearts like mine are meant for the world. I think the world holds too much pain for those who feel as deeply as I do.
I know in my personal life, love and friendships, it has definitely not been good for me. I tend to love and hold on to things that I would have been better walking away from. I tend to forgive and forgive, even when the other person isn’t even sorry. I try to always see the good in people, even when it’s not there.
Unlike the Grinch, what do you do with a heart that is two sizes too big?
I know sometimes I would like to rip it from my chest, and become like so many I meet… heartless. Just worry about myself and nobody else. Not care about those hurting and the needs of others. Do whatever I want without an ounce of care how it may affect others. People are out there doing it all the time. Heck just look at social media and you will see those who couldn’t care less who they hurt.
Yet I know I can’t do that. I wouldn’t want to.
 I don’t want to change my heart to fit the world; I want to change the world to fit my heart. How many times have I wrote about kindness? I have said it before time and time agaIn, yet I will say it again. Just be nice, people. Basic kindergarten rules people… BE NICE!
I always tell myself when I am feeling down or sorry for myself, Look around Barb and you will see people with real problems. Nothing helps you put your petty problems into perspective then seeing someone battling cancer, a sick child, or someone who just lost everything.
I think we all could do with a little more looking around. Let us get a good perspective. Let us see those hurting and then ask ourselves how we can help.
Is that too much of a step for you? Need to start smaller? Well how about the next time you are about to open your mouth to say something mean or hurtful… just don’t. Shut your mouth and let that opportunity to be mean pass. That would be a start for some of you.
Stop with the posts that spread and fuel hate. Stop thinking your opinion is somehow more important  than everyone else’s. Stop judging, stop hating, just stop being mean period.
Trust me there are many of us whose heart just can’t take it anymore.
Also when dealing with others, please remember that you never know the battle someone else is fighting. Maybe they are dealing with being at a low point in their life. Maybe they are dealing with the death of a loved one; maybe they are fighting to live… you never know. It costs nothing to be kind.
Think about a time in your life when your obstacles were like mountains, when it took everything you had to just get out of bed. When you felt like you couldn’t go on. Think how you would like for people to have treated you.
Can you picture that? The kind word you wish someone would have spoken, the nice gesture you wish someone would have done? Well let us try to do that. How does the saying go? Don’t look for a miracle, be the miracle. Let us all be the change we want to see.
It all begins with one act of kindness, one small gesture, one kind world… and let it spread like wildfire!!
I am never going to stop being kind. I plan on continuing to love, even though my heart may get broken. I plan to forgive, even if they are not sorry. I am going to try and sow happiness in a world that desperately needs it.
This big-hearted person is praying that it’s contagious too!! Just saying…